Do you like what you see, or does it even matter?
1/22/14: DAILY PROMPT: Mirror, Mirror
Today’s Prompt is not an easy prompt.. But I think that its one that has bothered me for a long time.. Below is what we were asked to blog/think about.
Look in the mirror. Does the person you see match the person you feel like on the inside? How much stock do you put in appearances?
So first, let me start with.. for the most part I do not put that much stock in appearance.. I mean I alway look my best, do my makeup and try to make my hair look pretty.. However, I really have no cares what others think about how I look. I mean, I love when someone say I look pretty, it makes me blush and usually I just say thanks, or no not really. But I really don;t care what they think.
But I care, and that’s where the problem lies.. Over the years, I always took care of myself, however I let myself gain weight and that bothered me.. SO I took things into action and have spent the last year losing weight. But I still don’t see the person I want to see when I look in the mirror. I really don’t feel like I am vain, but Vanity has reared its ugly head and I feel like anytime I have a chance to look in a mirror I am..
Do I feel like the Person that I see in the mirror? No, I really don’t like that I feel unattractive, I feel (and I hate to use this word because I can already feel the judgement) FAT. I feel lost, I feel diffident, I feel sorrow, I feel pain. But when I look in the mirror, the person that stares out at me, looks pretty, she is confident, on most days she looks professional, she does not look like she is FAT.
I keep trying to tell my daughter that image is not the most important thing.. But I realize from this post, that I am VERY Consumed by my image.. Do I think she does not notice how often I look in the mirror? Do I think she can not tell how obsessed I am about losing weight, so I look better? What kind of a lesson have I been teaching her? Or maybe she does not care because she thinks her mommy is pretty.. I can only hope that and keep telling her that image is not everything in this crazy world.
I will remind every one ONE THING that is kind off topic, but One lesson I did learn from my mom, is that no matter how you feel, if you look your best then no one can tell what you are really feeling.. and I totally can tell you this is true!!!
So what do you think.. YOUR my Mirror:
1. What do you see when you look at me?
2. What do you see when you look in the Mirror?